Saturday, April 19, 2008

Top ten things to do after being laid off

A list I made up entirely myself. Enjoy!

10. Return to your office with lawn chairs. Set them up in the lobby, entrance way, parking lot, kitchen, etc. and sit with popcorn and soda watching your former co-workers do your old job.

9. Have your former co-workers page you over the intercom...several times.

8. Return to your office with a CNN reporter claiming that you're doing an expose on insider trading.

7. "I could...set the building on fire."

6. Call the receptionist and ask for yourself. Don't disguise your voice.

5. Remember all those post-it notes and pens you accidentally took home over the years? Mail them back to the office...one at a time...anonymously.

4. Two words: Water Balloons.

3. Have five large pizzas delivered to the office health/fitness nut.

2. Return to the building after hours with a roll of caution tape. Rope off random sections of parking lot. Bonus points if you do this during work hours when there are cars in the spaces you rope off.

And the number one thing to do after being laid off.....

1. Drink heavily.

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